Unitarian Universalist Congregation of Phoenix

On Valentine's Day, Reverend Susan Frederick-Gray said "No More" to marriage inequality

On Sunday, February 14, our Sunday services were devoted to re-imagining Valentine's Day as one of many events across the country coordinated by the Standing on the Side of Love campaign.

The Rev. Susan Frederick-Gray preached on marriage equality and announced she will no longer sign marriage licenses for heterosexual couples. She said,

"As a matter of conscience, out of my own faith and my own beliefs, I am no longer willing to act as an agent of the state in carrying out this discrimination."

She preached that it is a matter of our religious freedom. As Unitarian Universalists, we must stand up for our belief that all people have the right to marry and to have a family with the person they love.

Rev. Susan will continue to perform the religious component of weddings, but will no longer sign the state licenses.

"When two people in my congregation, be they two women, two men or a man and a woman, come to me and say, 'Will you marry us before the congregation? We want to celebrate this love that we've found,' they're looking for a religious sacrament."

Couples will have to see a judge to make their marriages legal.

The impact of Rev. Susan's sermon and announcement has been great in the congregation. We shared many hugs and tears. We are proud of our minister and proud to members of the UUCP.

Here are links to a Channel 12 news report and a radio news segmentabout the UUCP's support for marriage equality.

"TOO MANY CAMERAS AND NOT ENOUGH FOOD: HOPE FOR HAITI NOW: A GLOBAL BENEFIT FOR EARTHQUAKE RELIEF"

Every once in awhile an event comes along that completely restores my faith in humanity at a time when I so desperately need it. Of late, it often seems that the world is going to hell in a hand basket. Then again, perhaps I should watch less CNN. But tonight was a whole different television experience while witnessing the hopeforhaitinow.org telethon.

Oh, the music was stellar, yet this was not your father’s fundraiser. Instead this viewer was treated to a fresh new look. The immediately noticeable production decision was a lack of performer introductions. No performers were identified by print or voice; instead the songs began immediately and it took a little time to figure out all the principals. The message was clear: this was not a night for stars but rather the island. Fortunately, being a certified music geek, I was able to recognize most performers (and I get by with a little help from my wife).

One hundred celebrities manned the phone lines: Ringo Starr, Jack Nicholson, Julia Roberts, Robin Williams, Reese Witherspoon, Tim Robbins, Meg Ryan, Steven Spielberg, Mel Gibson, and many more. From time to time the viewer was allowed to listen in on a phone conversation between celeb and caller. Again, egos were checked at the door. And what a brilliant incentive to phone in a donation!

Mother Nature is very consistent in doling out tragedies, but we are changing how we mobilize and televise. It was not so long ago that MTV botched the televised coverage of the 1985 Live Aid concert for famine relief in Africa. The organizer Bob Geldof was knighted, but the MTV veejays and producers snatched defeat from the jaws of victory. Since that mid 80’s prototype sprang Farm Aid, Free Tibet, Live Earth, The Concert for New York City, and a multitude of causes. Technically speaking it has been two steps forward, one step back. But I have never witnessed a benefit, especially one thrown together on such short notice, so technically proficient. The sound was terrific, the live Anderson Cooper feeds timely and immediate, the camera work spot on, the musicians crisp. If not for the graphics, I would not have known which of the seamless feeds were from Los Angeles, New York or London. Haiti requires relief assistance now and technical proficiency underpinned the beauty of the music and the emotional impact of the concert.

The Police released the single “Driven to Tears” in 1980 which Sting performed tonight with the Roots. Perhaps the most memorable line is “"Seems that when some innocent die/ All we can offer them is a page in some magazine/ Too many cameras and not enough food/ 'Cause this is what we've seen," Thirty years later we can begin to see relief efforts catching up with the quickness of the media. It’s a daunting task, but musicians and actors know they have the star power to galvanize. There are always critics who think actors should stick to acting and musicians stick to playing, but they instinctively know they can accomplish feats of which politicians can only dream.
Wyclef Jean
Oh, and about that music ……

Alicia Keys: "Prelude to a Kiss"

Coldplay: "A Message"

Bruce Springsteen: "We Shall Overcome"

Stevie Wonder: "A Time to Love"/ "Bridge Over Troubled Water"

Shakira: "I'll Stand by You"

John Legend: "Motherless Child"

Mary J. Blige: "Hard Times"

Taylor Swift: "Breathless"

Christina Aguilera: "Lift Me Up"

Sting: "Driven To Tears"

Beyoncé: "Halo"

Sheryl Crow, Keith Urban and Kid Rock: "Lean on Me"

Madonna: "Like a Prayer"

Justin Timberlake: "Hallelujah"

Jennifer Hudson: "Let It Be"

Emeline Michel: "Many Rivers To Cross"

Jay-Z with U2's Bono and The Edge (featuring Rihanna): "Stranded (Haiti Mon Amour)"

Dave Matthews & Neil Young: "Alone & Forsaken"

Wyclef Jean: "Rivers of Babylon"


Learn more about what you can do to help with earthquake-relief efforts in Haiti, and for more information, see Think MTV. Visit HopeForHaitiNow.org or call (877) 99-HAITI to make a donation now.
iTunes customers can exclusively pre-order the "Hope for Haiti Now" full-performance album ($7.99) and the full two-hour video telecast ($1.99). Pre-orders will be delivered in the days following the telethon. Individual audio performances will also be available for purchase and download for 99 cents each in the days following the telethon. Apple, the record labels and the artists will donate their share of the proceeds to Haiti relief funds managed by "Hope for Haiti Now" charities, including the Red Cross and Wyclef's Yele Haiti foundation. Performances will also be available for purchase in the days following the event through Amazon's MP3 service and Rhapsody, through distribution provided by INgrooves.

Ladies and germs, children of all ages, friends and neighbors, viewers at home . . . I, Famous Eccentric, am proud to present . . .

[drumroll]

THE END OF 2009!!!!! YAAAAAYYYYY!!!!!

Picture me, if you will, dancing for joy. I'm stomping around, twirling in place, flipping my hair, and whooping at the top of my lungs. Granted, all this action is taking place in my mind--I'm laughing on the inside, so to speak--but it's meant to illustrate just how thrilled I am to have the opportunity to shake my booty over 2009's grave.

My very own 2009 began with the death of my beloved aunt and ended with nine stitches in my index finger. Between January and December, I had two relationships go sour, remained unemployed, moved houses twice, and bid a fond farewell to my Ford Taurus, Martha. I know I'm not the only one, either; almost everyone I know had a terrible year. I'm not sure what black cloud decided to hover over all of us, and I don't know why it's been hanging around, but there have been a few times during these past months that I could've sworn I heard its oily laugh in the distance.

To continue in this dolorous vein, I must confess that New Year's Eve is my least favorite holiday. If you've ever gone on vacation with the insistent thought that you've forgotten something, then you probably understand what I go through. It's like I'm about to wander into the future unprepared and ill-equipped, like walking into a lecture hall in my underwear, like I'm bringing that proverbial knife to that legendary gun fight. I also become suddenly aware that I'm older and not necessarily wiser, that the holidays are winding down into their disappointing aftermath, and that with a new year comes new obligations.

I am not a pessimist, though, and I won't be feeling this way for long. I saw something yesterday afternoon that made me smile, and it also made me think.

I'm spending the holiday with my best friend and her family. After they picked me up (and also after my friend fell on her rear while descending my parents' icy front steps--I'm telling you, it was an awful year until the last), we happened to drive past a church. The sign in front bore a pretty typical New Year's message: "God has the power to make all things new, including you!"

I know I don't have to say this for my fellow Unitarian Universalists' benefit, but "God" can mean a lot of different things. My ideas about God are in a constant state of flux, really. When I saw that sign, several thoughts came to me, but the most persistent image in my mind came from a story I once heard as a kid. Here it is, more or less:

As I said before--as I harped on about, really--it's been a weird year. Looking at it differently, though, I remember how many people fed me, figuratively and literally. My friends were there for me continually. When I had to move, they gave me a place to live and carried my boxes. When I was heartbroken, they heard me out and gave me honest feedback. When I was taken by ambulance to the hospital a few weeks ago, they came for me in the wee hours of the morning and stayed up all night, waiting for me to get my stitches, going out and getting my car, and picking up my prescriptions.

When I felt helpless, they held my hands.

I can only hope that I have been a worthy friend. I never make New Year's resolutions; the way I see it is that a resolution can be made any time. In 2010, however, I am making a commitment to look around me for those locked elbows, which I'm sure I'll be able to see if I only pay enough attention. My arms may be stretched out as well, but instead of viewing this as a handicap, it can serve as a gesture of welcome.

Happy New Year, friends and neighbors. Here's to a beautiful 2010. We have the power to make it so.

"It's been a long December, and there's reason to believe maybe this year will be better than the last . . ."

--Counting Crows, "Long December"

Three Ghosts and Three Prayers for the New Year

For many years, it’s been my tradition to read Dickens’s A Christmas Carol during the week before Christmas. Though the story is populated by supernatural characters, these beings do not “save” Scrooge. Scrooge’s miraculous change is purely human. His transformation is so moving precisely because he represents an opportunity which is available to all of us. Each year the story speaks to me with both new and familiar lessons.

From the Ghost of Christmas Past:

When Scrooge is visited by the Ghost of Christmas Past, where does the Ghost take him first? They walk down a country road to a schoolhouse.

“That school is not quite deserted,” said the Ghost. “A solitary child, neglected by his friends, is left there still.”

Scrooge said he knew it and he sobbed…Scrooge sat down upon a seat and wept to see his poor forgotten self as he had used to be.

Scrooge comes face to face with his past and he feels compassion for himself. Almost immediately, he reacts:

“Poor boy! I wish…But it is too late now.”

“What is the matter? Asked he Spirit.

“Nothing,” said Scrooge.

“Nothing. There was a boy singing a Christmas carol at my door last night.

I should liked to have given him something. That’s all.”

Scrooge’s compassion for himself has the immediate effect of opening his heart to others. He has a visceral recognition of his connectedness to everyone. Marley’s Ghost may have scared Scrooge into listening; but it was his compassion for himself that led to his rebirth as a man who comes to be loved by many. Scrooge began to honestly examine his life with kindness toward himself and others. This is spiritual practice. When we come together each Sunday to hear and contemplate Reverend Susan’s sermon, to be uplifted by music, to learn from and teach each other, we are (thankfully) surrounded by caring and loving friends instead of specters in the night. But the result is the same--our spiritual practice helps us grow our hearts and take that compassion out to the bigger world.

May my spiritual practice this year help me to become more compassionate toward myself and others.

From the Ghost of Christmas Present: 

Two of the supporting characters stood out in my reading this year: Bob Cratchit and Scrooge’s nephew. The Ghost of Christmas Present visits each man with Scrooge. When they spy in on the Cratchit family, Bob makes a toast before carving the family’s modest goose.

“I’ll give you Mr. Scrooge, the founder of the feast.”

Martha Cratchit is not so magnanimous, but even she complies, for Bob’s sake and in the spirit of Christmas.

Bob Cratchit’s toast is nothing short of amazing to me.

He’s been mistreated and mired in poverty, yet his thankfulness abounds. This family could so easily be sitting around the hearth complaining, despondent, focused on the injustice of their circumstances. Why does Bob toast Scrooge? Is it because he recognizes the richness of his own life compared to the loneliness of Scrooge’s? Whatever its source, Bob’s gratitude uplifts the whole family.

The Ghost of Christmas Present also takes Scrooge to his nephew’s home where they are greeted by the laughter of his guests. Scrooge’s nephew says of Scrooge:

"I am sorry for him; I couldn’t be angry with him if I tried. Who suffers by all of his whims? Himself, always. Here he takes it into his head to dislike us, and he won’t come and dine with us. What’s the consequence? He loses some pleasant moments, which could do him no harm. I mean to give him the same chance every year, whether he likes it or not, for I pity him. He may rail against Christmas till he dies, but he can’t help thinking better of it—I defy him—if he finds me going there year after year and saying ‘Uncle Scrooge, how are you? If it only puts him in a mind to leave his poor clerk fifty pounds, that’s something..”

Scrooge’s nephew is remarkable—not because he pities Scrooge—but for his tenacity in approaching Scrooge year after year. Nothing in his experience would lead him to think that his actions will make any difference. But his compassion fosters hope—he is called to act. And his action makes the ground fertile for Scrooge’s transformation.

May I live this year with gratitude, tenacity of spirit and hope.

From the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come:

The Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come offers no comfort to Scrooge as the Ghost reveals the natural consequences of Scrooge’s ill-used life. It is a harsh message—the only emotion felt at Scrooge’s death is the relief of a young family, free of the debt they owed. Whatever else I glean from my yearly reading, the message of the Third Ghost always resonates: life ends. In some Buddhist traditions, practitioners spend the night meditating at the charnel grounds for several reasons, not the least of which is to fully realize the transience of this life. Another guru I know, my husband, often responds to my stress attacks with a succinct reply: “You’ll be dead soon.” All remind me we are here to live this precious human life which is so rare in the universe. There is not a minute to lose.

So along with Scrooge, I say:

“May I will live in the Past, the Present and the Future! May the Spirits of all three strive within me!”

And with the Christmas spirit of compassion and hope—God Bless Us Everyone.

T’was the night before Christmas, when across the great ocean,
The waves lapped quietly with a soft rocking motion.
Infinite stars hung in the heavens with care,
It begs the question.. again... who’s out there?

The sailors were nestled with family and friends,
Weary from a season of means without ends.
The stars make me restless; I wander the deck,
Just the infinite blue ocean, and me, a blue speck.

The moon on the waves breaking over the reef
looks like freshly fallen snow in a winter motif
I wake from reflection by a flash of bright light,
Shooting from Gemini like a rocket in flight.

A tiny bit of comet come to join our blue home!
A new sailor launched to the wind and the foam.
Perhaps the iron from an ancient meteorite,
streams through my blood on this silent night.

The water and air and the flesh and the bone,
Came from the death throes of stars eons unknown.
But are we not more than the sum of our parts?
Is there more than atoms in the depths of our hearts?

We struggle each day through crest and through trough,
And slowly we let the joy of sailing wear off.
The gift we are given is a majestic blue boat,
And an infinite ocean to keep us afloat.

The drums from the surf and the dolphin’s shrill whistle,
The gulls float and dance like the down of a thistle.
These things we all have, but may not deserve,
Are enjoyed only by those who reflect and observe.

Tonight we sing songs of the infinite’s rebirth,
Of the miracle of water, sun, air and earth.
The infinite answers, but I know not how,
though I’ve been sailing this ocean all my life now.

Sail on we must, kindred pilgrim souls,
On this long night, we’ll dream of more peaceful shoals.
May the beacon in your heart be your own guiding light.
Merry Sailing to all and to all a good night.

Blue Boat Boy

"Blue Boat Home" is written by Peter Mayer (www.blueboat.net) and the video was compiled by Scott McNeill, candidate for the Unitarian Universalist ministry (ichalice.blogspot.com). Please take a moment to reflect on your own walk on this beautiful "Blue Boat Home."